Medical trauma can leave you feeling voiceless. You didn’t choose the earth-shattering diagnoses – you had a stroke, you have cancer, you need an amputation – you could die. Medical personnel speak in their terminology, and you feel lost. Suddenly, you don’t seem to understand the meaning of common words, and the world becomes an overwhelming, too-loud place.
Others seem to develop the urge to fill silence with words, while you long to hear the comforting voice of God. They give unsolicited advice and talk about other people’s experiences as if they have first-hand knowledge. Silence becomes your friend and foe. You may feel like you are not yourself anymore, caught in a cruel dream that dawn will eventually erase.
What is happening to you? Your thoughts rush through your mind at lightning speed, yet you feel empty. The storm of intense emotions floods everything you thought you knew about life, coping, and faith. The side effects of medication flood your body, raging through every system. Sleep becomes a stranger. Somehow, you gasp for air and purposefully breathe one breath after another - putting one foot in front of the other - with a shallow, weak smile.
This is not a magic breakthrough because you feel you are not yourself anymore and don’t know how to fix this. There is no quick fix, and you don’t even know how to try. What is your identity now? Are you a victim who fell flat on your face in a pool of pain, or are you a survivor who will find the strength to rise once more? Are you a faith warrior or an emotional cripple burdened with worry and anger?
You realise you are alive like the sun breaks through the clouds on a stormy day. You have come this far, and although it seems easier to die than to live, being alive becomes more important than ever. You see your loved ones through new eyes and appreciate their love more deeply than before.
Dealing with people can be the hardest part of getting back on your feet. Choose the champions closest to you carefully. They can break your spirit or raise your arms. They will help you take one step at a time and get through this one way or another.
You might feel you have little faith and strength to go on, but you will find the courage to continue even when your strength is small. You only need faith as little as a mustard seed, and God will carry you through this time.
Talk to God, your Maker, about everything. Thank Him for the blessings you are aware of and pour your emotions out in prayer. He gives you the Holy Spirit as your Comforter during this time. When you are overwhelmed and don’t know what to think or pray, read your Bible. Let His Word be an anchor in this storm. Hold on to your faith with everything in you!
Although this journey is not easy, you are much stronger than you ever imagined. At the same time, you are not alone because I am just a phone call away. I can support you on your journey. You can make an online or in-person counselling appointment 24/7.